Just what the %$#@! is community anyway?

Yep, another night of sleep lost pondering imponderables!

So yesterday I was engaged in a conversation with one of our city council members and a Lion's Club president.  Our conversation eventually came around to what Ferndale should be doing to improve our "downtown" area.  Which if you haven't been to Ferndale, WA consists of an area on both sides of Main Street roughly 4-5 blocks long.   The City of Ferndale may have a different definition but that is what I believe most Ferndalian's/Ferndaler's  would mean when they refer to downtown.

As we spoke, the LC Pres, revealed that she'd grown up in a small town in the Northeast and knew what a small town should look like.  "The churches are white and look a certain way" kinda stuck in my head.   The city council person noted that they received lots of comments about how ugly downtown was.  As we were standing and talking in the parking lot at the southeast corner of Main and 1st, I looked down the street and realized that I had no real opinion about the downtown. 

I've lived in Ferndale for almost 6 years now.  Downtown is really just bunch of buildings I drive past.  In the entire time I've lived here, I've been in less than half the buildings in the downtown area and most of those only a few times and only 3 or 4 more than a few times.  Simply put unless I am getting something to eat, I rarely have reason to go downtown. 

In the summer they hang flower baskets from the downtown lamp posts and around Christmas they put up some lighted snowflakes and such on them.  On flag days, the Kiwanis, line Main Street with American Flags.  The Ferndale Chamber of Commerce organizes an annual Street Festival in the middle of downtown.  Beyond that I can't think of much that happens downtown of any real note.

Anyway this whole conversation got me to thinking about just what is community and what does it really mean to me, because of late I've been explaining a lot of what I do as wanting to give back to my community. 

Historically, I grew up in suburbia.  The Piggly Wiggly was where we did most of our grocery shopping as I remember, then they put in a strip mall of sorts a few blocks away from home.  Mostly, we drove places to buy what we needed.  We didn't hang out and socialize when we shopped.

I lived most of my early years in homes my father built.  Our lives pretty much revolved around our house.  My dad's family was in and around West Virginia.  My extended family consisted mostly of my Mom's Mom, her brothers and their families.   I saw them on holiday's but not much beyond that. 

Our neighbors were generally friendly and helpful to each other but there again not really a lot of contact.  Family friends were spread all over the county so even the best of them were only seen infrequently.  It was kind of a treat to go visiting.

We weren't a religious family and I personally left the church at around age 12 when I discovered that their god and my god were not the same.

I guess what I am getting to here is that community wasn't really an experience for me as much as it is an idea that I have come to respect.  The thing is I am basically an introvert, meaning most of my attention and energy is directed to or derived from my inner life.  I often find myself not attending to what is going on beyond my own mind.   This doesn't mean that I don't need or care about others.  Though it does explain why I am sometimes clueless about them.

It is clear to me that community is something that I have been learning about for most of my life and yet am still struggling to understand and to know.  Sharing time in sweat lodges did a lot to bring me around to a better understanding or at least a better recognition of the importance of community. 

Community really has little to do with places or things.  It is all about relationships/interdependence.   I really don't care what the downtown looks like because it is not what makes a community viable to my mind.  What community means to me is how we regard each other, how we care for and treat each other.  I prefer a community where I feel safe and can openly be/share myself.  The community I want not only lets me be the best me I can be, it wants to help me do that!  And it wants that for every member of the community!

So the question remains how can we make Ferndale a better community?  What do you mean when you think of community?  What are you really looking for?  I for one would really like to hear what you have to say?