What's in a Name?

A few years back, I asked for a naming ceremony in a Thunderbird sweat lodge. The name given to me that day was Mukwa Ogimaa. It is from the Ojibwa language and means Bear Chief or Leader. At the time of my naming, I remember the surge of pleasure at receiving such a "Cool and Powerful" name. I also remember thinking "Oh Shit, what have I gotten myself into."

I have been carrying this name around for a while now; not giving it much attention. Recently, it has come to me that I want/need to know and understand what the name really means/implies and why the name was given to me. Part of this sudden need was the recognition that at least some people I've met in the world believe that there is more to a name than just a label.

It occurred to me that names in American society at least have lost any function beyond providing a public designator for an individual. They no longer provide any reliable clues about where we come from geographically or culturally. They do not tell us anything about our occupation, race, religion, or social class or any of a myriad of facts/myths they once provided. If you assume they do tell you anything you are likely to be find yourself humiliated or embarrassed.

The thing is; I asked for this name. I wanted it. I wanted to feel that special little boost of having a secret name, a spirit name. Something that would help me feel just a bit closer to the spirits. Something to help me feel that I was a member of the circle.

So I was given this wonderful, cool, and powerful name. Recently, I've noticed that when I've shared this name with certain people, that they looked at me and spoke to me in a way different than I've experienced before. At first it just made me feel a tad bit uncomfortable, but lately it is starting to press upon me.

I've found myself asking, what do I know about being a Mukwa Ogimaa (I assume that I am not the only person to carry this name.) There is a weight to this name. This is a name that demands to be carried by a substantial person, a responsible person, a wise person, a caring person, ...

I feel the name calling me to be much more than I have been. I fear that I can not be a Mukwa Ogimaa. I have been given this name, in a naming ceremony, in a lodge. I can not undo this. I am Mukwa Ogimaa whether I believe in myself or not. The spirits believe or I would not have been given the name.

So these days, I am asking the spirits to guide me, to teach me how to be a Mukwa Ogimaa.

Mitakuye Oyasin